Soap manager

by Ash Williams

2014, Los Angeles: I was introduced to a manager who specialised in TV soaps (Bold & The Beautiful, Days of Our Lives, General Hospital etc). His name was Michael B and he agreed to see me for an audition. If the audition went well he would represent me and I'd be a good chance to get on Days of Our Lives. 

I arrived at his house in the Hollywood Hills ready for the audition - it was a scene from 'Sleepless in Seattle'. He said "alright come into my kitchen and take a seat" (it was the first time I had auditioned in somebody's kitchen. Michael said "are you ready?" I said "yep". We started the scene and two small yappy dogs came running down the stairs (they looked like Cocker Spaniels) and beelined it for my legs and immediately began humping my legs - one each - I looked at Michael as if to say "do you want me to keep going?" He literally said "keep going". The dogs continued to root my legs and were making groaning noises, I finally finished the audition and Michael said "stop it you two!", then the dogs magically disappeared. 

Michael then said "that was great!". I said "let's do it again because the dogs were humping my legs the whole time" to which he replied "no, I've seen enough and I'm impressed with your focus. I would like to represent you". I happily accepted. Michael was now my manager. I still don't know if he trained his dogs specifically to hump my legs... I reckon he did.

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